I2 weeks 1 day
It has been about a month since I last posted, and I am sorry that I have neglected my blogging duties. I am still alive & pregnant...as far as I know. My fears have heightened these past few weeks. I kept saying to myself, "if I can just get to 12 weeks, I'd feel much better". Well, here I am, and do I feel much better...not really because now I am saying "if I can only get to my next OB appointment (1/17), I'd feel much better". The sad thing is that if I am lucky enough to get through that appointment without any problems, I am going to say "if I can just get through the big u/s, I'd feel much better". And no doubt there will be something after that. Now don't get me wrong, I am extremely grateful & happy to be pregnant and this far along. I hate that I am never satisfied. Maybe that should be my new year's resolution!
I've past all my previous miscarriage milestones, which is a huge relief, but I am just so afraid of something going wrong. It was very comforting to read Janet & Crista talk about fear because they made me realize I am not alone. I also want to thank Patty, Lynn, Katie, and Crista for pulling me out of my cave. Maybe out here I won't be so afraid!
Take care, Happy 2005, & Best wishes to all!
I've past all my previous miscarriage milestones, which is a huge relief, but I am just so afraid of something going wrong. It was very comforting to read Janet & Crista talk about fear because they made me realize I am not alone. I also want to thank Patty, Lynn, Katie, and Crista for pulling me out of my cave. Maybe out here I won't be so afraid!
Take care, Happy 2005, & Best wishes to all!
posted by Cara @ 1:02 PM
4 Comments:
At 5:22 PM,
Summer Girl said…
Cara! I'm so happy you're out of your cave but totally understand you being there. I still have those moments too and I live daily with the "if only I can get to..." comments. Fear has a way of taking over all sense of Trust and keeps us from enjoying things as we should. On a particularly bad day I responded to Janet on my blog about the realationship between Trust and Fear. Janet is right- there doesn't seem to be a lot of "negative" pregnancy posts. I'm getting on my soapbox again and don't need to... preaching to the choir! Also wanted to share that I have a very nosy secretary at my school. She drives me nuts!! I told the staff when I was 12 weeks. It was one attempt to make this pregnancy seem real! I'm sure the kiddos are growing as they should so try to keep your chin up! I can't wait to hear the progress from your next appointment. I can't wait to see belly shots too!
At 6:24 PM,
Sara said…
Hey there -
I am new to the blogging world and also a fellow teacher. I was hoping you would post again soon, and I am very glad to hear that all is well for you and your little ones!
-Sara
http://prenatalpatience.blogspot.com
At 1:22 PM,
Patty said…
Welcome back. I am so glad you are back from hiding. I can't wait to see your belly shot. I know the fear and anxiety is heightened. I am sure all will be great at your next appointment. Your double miracle is just so darned exciting. I bet you are tired growing two babies. Keep your chin up and take it one day at a time.
love ya,
At 8:10 PM,
Kether said…
Welcome back Cara. I think you're totally normal. My mantra was one more minute, one more hour, one more day. I think we all live from appointment to appointment and from week to week where we can tick off another of the 40.I wish I could say that got better for me, but it didn't. It eased up, sure, but it was always there in the back of my mind.
Eventually Fear will be easier to chase away. That's the good news! =)
Congrats on reaching 12 weeks. I look forward to reading about 28 more!
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